You Don’t Have to ‘Out’ Yourself: Asking for Workplace Changes Without Labels
In recent years, more and more adults have been getting diagnosed with ADHD, autism or with both ADHD and autism (AuDHD). and even more are self-identifying with these diagnoses as they learn more about the experience of people with ADHD, or autistic or AuDHD individuals. According to the DSM-V-TR (the latest diagnostic manual for psychology), ADHD symptoms include hyperactivity, inattention, and impulsivity, while autism involves challenges with social interactions and communications, as well as sensory processing differences and repetitive patterns of behavior (American Psychiatric Association, 2022). These clinical definitions focus on external behaviors and ignore the inner experience of individuals.
While this post is focused on the experiences of folks with ADHD and autistic individuals, neurodiverse individuals of all varieties can benefit from the principles I'm discussing here, so I'll be referring to neurodiverse individuals as a whole from now on, not just people with ADHD or autistic individuals.
One of the challenges of being neurodiverse, including people who identify as having ADHD and/or autistic brains, is that we don't have good ways of expressing our inner experiences, so other people don't know what's going on inside.
Many people have gotten to adulthood without getting a diagnosis, whether they have the diagnosis not now. If you are in this group, this often means that you may have found ways to manage some of your differences in ways that work to some degree for you. You may have a job, or not, or may struggle to hold a "traditional job." You may have a job that works, but is exhausting or causes you anxiety even if you can't figure out why. You may have friends who tell you that you can't be neurodiverse because you aren't good at math, or you're too organized, or you have a job, or you're social, or whatever. These folks are making assumptions about you because of how well you have adjusted to the world around you. Only you know your inner experience, only you know what stresses you out, or what is hard. You deserve to be able to adjust for what you need, but, in today's world, you have to ask for it.
What the Law Says (in the US)
If you are in the US, the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) protects employees who are neurodivergent and, theoretically, protects them from discrimination. The ADA also provides the right to reasonable accommodations as long as the employer isn't caused undue hardship (Americans with Disabilities Act, 1990). However, how the law is implemented varies widely from business to business. In many companies, neurodivergent employees still face bias, stigma, and a general lack of understanding (Muscat, 2024).
This means that neurodivergent people run a real risk of negative impact on their jobs and career if they disclose their diagnosis (Westover, 2026). And the research doesn't really take into account the folks who haven't gotten a diagnosis, but experience the world in a neurodiverse way. As a result, many neurodivergent individuals will mask, or try to hide their neurodivergent traits and pretend to be neurotypical. Many ways that people mask can include constantly evaluating what they are saying, how they are holding their body, intentionally suppressing behaviors or hiding how anxious or stressed out they are. Masking can be exhausting, as it takes effort to prevent yourself from doing the things that you naturally want to do, and can result in burnout, emotional fatigue, and exhaustion (Kidwell et al., 2023).
So, what's a person to do?
If you work in a reasonable, not-particularly-toxic, work environment, you may not need to disclose your diagnosis or use a label to get what you need. Universal Design is a practice that creates processes, environments, and systems so that they have the greatest level of inclusion without needing individual exceptions or adjustments (Navigating ADHD Disclosure In The Workplace, 2025). Universal Design started out in the field of architecture in the 1970's as architects were working to make buildings and physical environments more accessible to people with disabilities without making disabled individuals have to adapt (The 7 Principles of Universal Design, n.d.). Over the years, the principles of Universal Design have been adapted to learning and work environments.
With Universal Design, and how we can make the environment more accessible, we can see that everyone benefits from:
Clear meeting agendas and sharing material for reviewing before the meeting
Following up with written action items and a decision log
Scheduling buffer time between meetings (I mean, someone's got to pee!)
Quiet spaces or focus rooms for when you need to focus on a problem
Allowing the use of noise cancelling headphones to reduce distractions
Allowing sensory-friendly environments with flexible lighting
(Mcdowall et al., 2025; Westover, 2026)
By focusing on the positive, productivity-improving, impact of these improvements on everyone, there is no need to talk about your specific diagnosis or label. It might even make you more efficient or productive than your neurotypical peers (Joy & Mia, 2024). You can try framing your requests around general team improvements and increasing productivity for the company (something that the finance folks will appreciate!).
These are not weird requests. When I worked in tech, the noise cancelling headphones were normal. We worked in an open workplace and it was common for folks to use noise-canceling headphones when they were focusing. The larger, over-ear headphones also acted as a "Do not disturb" sign for everyone. In business school, I was taught to always send out the agenda and documents ahead of time, and to always send out meeting notes with action items and decisions. Google has even seen the value in short meetings and has implemented a setting to ensure that people could get that break if they want to. A nearby zoo provides noise canceling headphones, encourages the use of shades when needed, and provides ramps to all of the exhibits. These simple, accessible changes allow people of varying abilities and sensory levels to enjoy the zoo.
Asking for Accommodations
Sometimes, it's easier to start with a script, so here are some examples of how you can ask for changes to your environment. In the next section, I'll talk about who you could talk to for your accommodations.
For Noise Canceling Headphones: I notice that I produce a higher quality of work if I can focus and avoid audio distractions. Could I use noise-canceling headphones to help me avoid distractions?
For Meeting Follow ups: I'd like to make sure that I am clear on what I need to do so nothing gets missed. Can I please request an email follow-up with action items and decisions made after our meetings?
For Meeting Agendas: I want to make sure that I'm prepared for our meetings so we don't waste time catching me up. Can you please send me an agenda and any pre-reads (or handouts/whatever the term is in your company) so I can bring my best ideas?
For Buffer Times: I know it's frustrating when we show up late for a meeting, but I need to pee between meetings. Can we use the Google Speedy Meetings setting so we have a few minutes between meetings and don't waste anyone's time?
For Flexible Lighting: The overhead lights really hurt my eyes and make it hard for me to focus. Can we switch to desk lights? OR Can I use shades or blue blockers (name your eye shields of choice) so they don't bother me and I can be more productive?
Note that in each of these scripts, you highlight how the company benefits from the accommodations that you are asking for.
Take Action
Now you have the scripts, and a bit of the information on why accommodations for you make a lot of sense for the company, when and who do you ask?
First, ask when you are feeling relatively calm. When you are feeling calm, it's easier to follow your script and respond reasonably to whatever response you get. Figure out when that is for you, maybe it's first thing in the morning, or right after a break? Or on a Monday, or a Friday? When is going to be up to each person and what works for them. Start with asking your manager. They may tell you to ask someone else, so be willing to ask 2 or 3 different people as you find the person who can actually give permission or make the changes. If you feel safe doing so, you can also ask HR for these accommodations, but, as you are highlighting the productivity improvements, it's often easier to start with your manager.
However you ask, whenever you ask, whatever you need, take the time and effort to ask for what you need. Don't try to compare your journey, your experience, to anyone else. Everyone's brains work differently - neurodivergent or not - so allow yourself the knowledge that you're doing the best for you.
What if You Get Denied?
Sometimes, the company can't reasonably make the changes you need. For example, building out new quiet spaces, or changing the lighting in the open office space. Hopefully, you have received a reason why it can't be done - and you're allowed to ask if you don't. That doesn't mean that you will get one, but it shouldn't hurt to ask politely and calmly. See if there are accommodations that you can make that will help (allowing for noise canceling headphones, shades, etc.) that will work for you, or maybe see if you can work remotely so you can control your environment.
Each situation will need your careful decision on what to do. Try to make decisions when you are calm(er) or have someone that you trust to bounce ideas off of. Decisions made in frustration or anger have a good chance to be not in your best interest. Review your current situation, see if you can make other changes that will help you minimize the amount you need to mask, and see if it makes sense for you to stay in that job. If you decide that it's time to leave, and if it's not too stressful, consider staying at your current job while you look for one that has better supports for your brain and nervous system. Remember that it's easier to find a job when you have one.
Neurodiverse people are usually living in a world that isn't designed for them, but that doesn't mean that we can't contribute or succeed. It just takes a bit more work as we figure out what works best for us. By taking the idea of Universal Design - making the space better for everyone - what we're requesting will make everyone more efficient and productive.
Whether you have a diagnosis or not, if you feel anxious or uncomfortable at work, try to get accommodations to make the work place into a more comfortable space for you. You, and your contributions, are worth it.
References
American Psychiatric Association. (2022). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (5th ed., text rev.). American Psychiatric Association Publishing.
Americans With Disabilities Act of 1990, 42 U.S.C. § 12101 et seq. (1990). https://www.ada.gov/pubs/adastatute08.htm
Joy, J., & Mia, C. (2024). How not to fit in: An unapologetic approach to navigating autism and ADHD. Thorsons.
Kidwell, K. E., Clancy, R. L., & Fisher, G. G. (2023). The devil you know versus the devil you don’t: Disclosure versus masking in the workplace. Industrial and Organizational Psychology, 16(1), 55–60. https://doi.org/10.1017/iop.2022.101
Mcdowall, A., Teoh, K., Beauregard, A., & Gawronska, J. (2025). Neurodiversity at work: Bridging research, practice, and policy. Acas Website.
Muscat, J. K. (2024, April 4). Navigating Neurodiversity in Employee Performance Reviews: Warning Signs and Solutions. Navigating Neurodiversity: Career Paths and Workplace Inclusion. https://josephkmuscat.com/navigating-neurodiversity-in-employee-performance-reviews-warning-signs-and-solutions
Navigating ADHD Disclosure In The Workplace: A Strategic Guide. (2025, November 26). Klarity Health, Inc. https://test.d2ysjydukc4efk.amplifyapp.com/post/navigating-adhd-disclosure-in-the-workplace-a-strategic-guide
The 7 Principles of Universal Design. (n.d.). Centre for Excellence in Universal Design. Retrieved July 21, 2026, from https://universaldesign.ie/about-universal-design/the-7-principles
Westover, J. H. (2026). Neurodiversity in the Workplace: A Comprehensive Examination of Organizational Practices Supporting Neurodivergent Employee Wellbeing. https://doi.org/10.2139/ssrn.6024114